Five Best Things To Say if You're Caught Sleeping at Your Desk

5. "They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen."

4. "This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time management course you sent me to."

3. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here just in time."

2. "Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?"

And the NUMBER ONE best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at
your desk...

1. Raise your head slowly and say, "...in Jesus' name, Amen."

---------

This has me cracking up. Last night was beer league afterall. Bad night. zzzzzzzzzzzzz

talk me out of it

At 11:00 I am going to buy a pack of cigarettes.

okay. It's 11:33. The good news is I didn't buy a pack. That's only because there isn't a convenient place for me to go and buy one in the half hour I have for "lunch". The bad news (sort of) is that I got one from a lovely woman down the hall.

Pet food recalls

I have linked my friend's blog over there --> "Playing Big". She is keeping her blog up to date about this scary scary situation. (I asked if I could link her here.)

Just FYI.

laughter and new heightened crushes

Jen made it to my house. There were some iffy spots but she kept on cruising. See how much she loves me? We watched movies and smoked pot. We watched Tristan and Isolde. We both swooned over King Marke (Rufus Sewell). We tried to watch The Covenant. Tried because, well, because it kind of sucks. She thinks Arkie's crush (Steven Strait ~ who is quite yummy) is swoonier than mine (Taylor Kitsch ~ yummier). hrmpf. ~TKit, help me out with this one.~ We watched a piece of XX:XY because I was trying to tell her why I am in love with Mark Ruffalo. He reminds me of Rob Mariano. And We Don't Live Here Anymore is hot. I watched Just Like Heaven recently and was thinking how much I like him. She said he is in Zodiac and I won't like him much in that one. I was all, "oh yes I will." We watched the Departed... sort of. We both fell asleep. We watched Good Will Hunting. Love that movie. (that brings up a survey I want to post somewhere ~ here or OT). What else did we watch? hmmm... Oh! The Holiday. I swooned a little over Jude Law in that movie. She is in love with him so it was better for her. What else? We watched part of Clay Pigeons... we saw the important parts. (Joaquin's sex scene) Seems like there should be more. We laughed a lot. It was good times.

Edited to add movies that I forgot about:
Just Like Heaven ~ not that I forgot about this movie. I just apparently forgot I watched it this weekend.
Tenacious D - hahahahaha... the mushroom scene


Anyway. I know my blog gets upset when it's missing some candy. Here's some Mark for my (it's not really me, it's the blog!) cravings.

make the snow stay away

Jen is coming over and I want the roads to be okay.
Also? My husband is on his way to Atlantic City with the pool league. They rent a big bus and just ride out there and drink. They're usually trashed when the get there. heh. Oh and he is rooming with Gary (guy who thinks I'm crazy). So yay for that. :) We like Gary. I like his wife a lot too. And his father-in-law. His FIL is actually how I know his wife. wow. This is a long uninteresting story so nevermind. But yay for DH rooming with Gary! And yay for Jen!

*evil eye at snow*

ohhhhhhh. heh. This whole week I've been saying "well, I need to clean because Jen is coming over." Then Wednesday, we had to go to the funeral home (his great aunt) and I had planned on cleaning then. So I was all, "now I have to do it all Friday night! boo hoo I hate cleaning. boo hoo." I came home from work yesterday, the kitchen was sparkling and the living room was clean. Oh and all the boxes in the spare room are pushed to one side. :) He goes, "and don't tell anybody that I cleaned the house because they will jag me off the whole bus trip." I said, "Well can I tell Jen?" He was like, "of course. She'll just say 'good thing. somebody has to.'" heh.

whoa

I am trying to catch up on Lukas this morning. The Posse makes that REALLY difficult to do. I've been keeping up with him for the most part but not the goings on of the Posse friends I made last summer. So I was trying to read the accounts of their meetings with him. Anyway, I came across this and it stopped me dead in my tracks.

dead.in.my.tracks.

He makes me really swoony. *dreamy sigh* I've been trying to stay away as much as possible but I needed a fix. I am such an addict. *heavy sigh* And my meth is busy on the left coast "recording an album".

heh. My mom always says she is amazed that I'm not a rock star or married to a rock star. I dated enough (well technically I only dated one but that was enough) of them back in the day to know that wasn't for me. But dammit I just love musicians.

Oh! note the zippers.

hee! Here's a closer look at the zippers.

and?

Yesterday when I left work, I went out the side door and was kind of trapped. Because there was a bus RIGHT.there. I kept saying the buses were right outside but like you usually have to go out the door and step off the sidewalk and onto the street and make a left before you run into them. Not yesterday though. Yesterday you couldn't even step off the sidewalk. I had to squeeze between this giant wall and a tour bus. I was embarrassed (because I have true honest to God low self esteem when I hate the way I look and right now I do) and hiding my face as much as I could. And then I realized that I was going to have to find a way over to the street because I was going to approach the hillside (that you can’t really walk on… I mean, you probably could but it would have turned out badly, I’m sure. Picture my fat ass rolling down the dirt hill into the side of a bus.) So I had to straddle a trailer hitch. I was horrified. I called Jen before I even got into my car to tell her how stupid I am. That’s when I realized I must have been walking really fast because I couldn’t breathe well enough to talk. I picked up my co-worker down the road and she goes, "Did you see them interviewing the bands outside?" I was like, "No! I practically RAN up the hill with my head down."

So that’s me. In a nutshell.

ugh.

just forget it

I want to scream sometimes. Why doesn't Glowie ever tell us anything interesting? Because. Just because. You will read about my crushes an on occasion you will read a rant. If you care to. Because I am in a good mood. That's a good thing. I mean, I thought it was. Why can't I be allowed to be in a good mood?

exhausting. fucking exhausting.

My life isn't fair

Shall I give you an example?



On my way down the hill to my office this morning, I thought... "hmmm. I wonder who is in concert here today that requires a street filled with tour buses." There was a guy buried in a hoodie standing with a security guard on the street right where I cross to get to my office. I was being cool, right, so I looked up the hill (as I told Jen, there was no real chance anything was coming down the hill since it was blocked by police at both ends and jam packed with tour buses so like even if the cops weren't blocking it, there isn't enough room for any vehichle to fit. well, maybe a motorcycle but I would have heard a motorcycle, right? What was I talking about? oh yeah...) to make sure there aren't any cars or whatever coming down and I walked into a pole. yep. Into a pole. I pretended I meant to do it or that I didn't do it or something. And I, of course, pretended I could care less who was buried in the hoodie.


So I look on the internet and it's Nickelcrap. blah. So I'm all "well but who's opening for them?" Guess who? Jen's new boyfriend ... Breaking Benjamin... and Three Days Grace. Hey, I like both of them. If I'd have known, I'd have put some makeup on or something, right?


So I go to get lunch. My boss was buying so I let her come with me *grin*. On our way back, we see this guy...

He's wearing black. All black. Except for a red baseball hat. Red. Red and black. Whose favorite colors are those? Mine. What color am I wearing today? Red and black. We match and everything. There are zippers on his pants that I just really want to unzip and stuff but my boss was with me and he looked like he was panicking about something. He was on the phone and walking all up and down the sidewalk totally ignoring his luggage that was sitting there on the sidewalk. So I couldn't like rape him or anything. :(

See? See how cute he is? *sob*


But his hair looks like that top picture. I seriously did not know this guy was this hot until I just walked right past him. Ten feet away. Right past him. I should have stolen his luggage, huh?

IMPORTANT NOTE: My Chemical Romance is coming to the Events Center on May 2nd. Muse is opening for them. Please, I beg of you, please remind me so I don't get all flustered when I see hot band dudes outside my office.

Vote

to save FNL. It will only take a second. Thanks.

Somebody put something in my coffee

My legs feel really long today. It's bizarre. I don't know how to explain it.

Anybody like the Ramones? Now this song is going through my head.

"Kick the jukebox, slam the floor
Drink, drink, drink, drink some more
I can't think
Hey! What's in this drink?

It feels like somebody put something
Somebody put something in my drink
Somebody put something
Somebody put something in my drink"

this guy that shoots with Shawn thinks I'm crazy

and he always seems to be around when I do stupid things. heh. He said ever since I stopped smoking, I've been acting crazy. Then he tried to give me a cigarette. hee. I'm not sure how many weeks it is but I think eight. Yay me. There is this SNL skit where this couple... I don't know how to explain it... but the chick chomps on gum and says, "he looks like a rabbit." I've been chewing gum a lot lately and I'm always wanting to say that. "{{chomp chomp}}he looks like a rabbit. {{chomp chomp}}" Well it occurred to me that this one guy who I think is nice-looking and is friends with the guy who thinks I'm crazy (They are the guys that watch FNL, btw.) actually does kind of look like a rabbit. We were talking about how they are going to pair up in the rooms when they go to Atlantic City. I said I assumed they (rabbit guy and guy who thinks I'm crazy) were rooming together and was hunting for a roomie for Shawn. ~I think he can probably room with drywall guy.~ But I just kept wanting to tell him he looks like a rabbit and pinch his cheeks. He isn't sure if he's going to AC because his wife is due to pop out a kid real soon. Jen would think I'm crazy for saying rabbit guy is nice-looking because he has REALLY long hair.

Jen is coming over in a couple weeks. One of my friends said he isn't going to Atlantic City with the guys from the league and asked what I was doing. I said, "My friend from Cleveland is coming over." He asked if I want to fool around (he always asks me things like that ~ it's a joke). I said, "Well we can always ask Jen." He said, "oh! Your friend from Cleveland is a girl?!?!" I said, "No. My male friend named Jen is coming to spend the night with me while my husband is away."

I don't really have female friends, yet most of the friends I've made on the internet are chicks. That's weird, huh?

I really need to lose weight. I cringe when people touch me.

stupid gmail

Breezy, I asked if this would work. And I guess it does. use < s > and then < / s > (without the spaces of course).

Arkie, I said:
well. I could go into that if you'd like. Jen has heard/read some of it before. I would like to take the tip of my tongue and trace it along every inch of his body and not let him move until I've covered all of him. every single beautiful inch. mmmm.

Jen, I said:
Go read the AI forums, you will get a good handle on how kids talk these days. Or you will feel really old. Or worst case scenario, you will go insane.

I think that's all of it.

Carey, did you get my response that said:
You'll have to support him by watching the show then. Otherwise, you are not allowed to put him on any of your perverted lists.

This is what I'm talking about, btw:

Today I would like to express my love for

HD. He taught me something new and it didn't even hurt too much. He is a good teacher. He just typed out simple instructions that even I could follow. How awesome is that?